About Me

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Ello Blog stalkers, my name's Lexi. I'm fifteen. my birthday is on the sixth of June. I'm a sophomore at Neligh-Oakdale. I've been a loser all my life. I'm not about to change. If you don't like it, there's a X out button. Nobody is making you stay.I hate people who think they know me. You will never know everything about me. I have low self esteem and confidence. I've been through a lot. Im fun. I do what i want. I do things I shouldn't. I hate when people think my business is theirs to talk about and spread around. I have trust issues. Summer is my favorite. I hate liars and drama. And believe me, i dont need anymore of it in my life. If you're just going to start shit and talk shit, don't bother wasting your time because i will ignore you. (: Wanna know more? Let's be best friendss(:

Friday, July 9, 2010

Written by Angela;

Its been said that we were never meant to be alone
Then why am I sitting here, staring at my phone?
You told me that you were going to call
But you planned for me to hit this wall
I hope your happy to watch me fall
Watch me fall down by myself
Watch me fall like no one else
Watch me fall like a typical clown
Watch me fall all over this town

Sunday, June 27, 2010

From First To Last - Emily with lyrics

(i had to edit this on august 26th)
me and my ex-boyfriends song.
its the cutest. we went out for a day, june 26th.
then broke up.
waited a week.. even though it still felt like we were dating, then july 4th, at 1am he asked me to take him back.. i did. june 11th.. he broke up with me. there are so many things we never worked out.. now almost 2 months later i can honestly say i dont feel for him as much anymore.. or at all. he is dating my bestfriend, megan.. me and him kinda now have an awkward friendship. but i want his friendship more than anything in the world. because he is just an awesome person. just awesome(: i dont know why. haha(:

-august 26th, 2010

Friday, June 25, 2010

I don't

I don't miss you at all.
I don't miss seeing you every day
I don't miss teasing you and being teased
I don't miss holding and playing with your hand
I don't miss talking on the phone
I don't miss your singing
I don't miss kissing you.
I don't miss winking and nudging
I don't miss being called drop-dead gorgeous
I don't miss laughing with you
I don't miss your cool sunglasses
I don't miss watching you play with my little brother
I don't miss your arms around me
I don't miss your notes
I don't miss your words
I don't miss you tickling me
I don't miss how my mom approved of you
I don't miss how handsome you are
I don't miss how passionate you could get
I don't miss swimming with you
I don't miss sticking my tongue out at you
I don't miss running my hands through your hair
I don't miss dancing with you
I don't miss resting my head on your shoulder
I don't miss throwing grass on you
I don't miss your smile
I don't miss all the things we'll never get to do together
I don't miss you kissing my hand
I don't miss your beautfil eyes
I don't miss how good you smell
I don't miss how happy you made me
I don't miss how you said my name
I don't miss feeling like I could fly when with you
I don't miss how comfortable I was with you
I don't miss how you were always there for me
I don't miss how proud I was of you
I don't miss how free we were

I don't miss loving you.


I wanna die
I wanna cry
I wanna fly
and I don't know why
I feel like this

I wanna see
I wanna flee
I wanna be
more than just a key
part of your life

I wanna feel
I wanna steal
I wanna heal
what seems so unreal
that: is us

I wanna play
I wanna slay
I wanna say
that it's okay
even when it's not

(written June 4th 2010)

The Cutting Curse;

Momma, see, I've got this curse,
I hurt myself; my God it hurts,
I tried to stop but it made me worse
I've cleaned more wounds than a full-time nurse.

I have this thing inside of me,
It just can't stomach me being me.
It turns and twists and I can't be free,
It burns, it cuts, it scratches me.

Momma, see, it's at it's worst,
I've lost control and how it hurts.
I tried to cope but I made it worse.
I needed help to kill this curse.

These scars are now a part of me,
These wounds a tragic diary.
I hope, I pray, I beg, I plead,
I cry, I scream, I bite, I bleed.

Momma, see, I'm all alone.
It doesn't matter if you're at home.
It doesn't matter if you care,
Soon enough I won't be there.

(Don't freak out, yes i did cut myself, but i havent since January 2010, and now that i dont do it anymore i thought maybe posting it would be okay, I wrote this on December 16, 2009)

For Stevey Lee;

What can happen everyday
Can change your life
And change your way
The help that you might find inside
Will only help you
In certain time
Because, you see, it won’t compare
To friends that help you
When you despair
They help you see the bluer skies
When all you hear
Are blacker lies
They help you laugh when you want to cry
They make you see light
When you want to die
They drag you out, when you stay in
You think you’ll lose,
They make you win
So take your friends, make sure they know
That they’re the ones
That make you glow.

(I wrote this a little while back for my friend Stevey)

I want;

I want someone that needs me as much as I need them.
Someone that actually wants to listen.
Someone that makes every moment of my life something special.
Someone who can make me laugh and smile all the time.
Someone who will always be my best friend.
Someone who will treat me like a princess from time to time.
Someone who understands me and can put up with all my crap.
Someone that will always make my heart pound like it's about to rip out of my chest.
Someone to spend forever with, and never make me want forever to end.

(Something I wrote a couple months ago)